A Tribute to My Mum on Her 80th Posthumous Birthday

My mother Oyindamola, you would have been 80 today Feb 13,2023 had the cold hands of death not taken you away from us that unforgettable day on Saturday June 6,2015.

Although it’s been 8 years since you left us, yet your thoughts and memories linger on in our minds.

Mum, how could we ever forget you?

I recall with nostalgia oftentimes in my childhood and teenage years when dad would see me talking with you so for long that he would humorously ask; “what do you and your mum always talk about?”

Even now in my adulthood, I can’t remember what it was exactly I found enjoyable talking with you about and even arguing with you on! Perhaps it was just because I enjoyed your company. Perhaps it was because I found in you a listening ear to my childish rantings. But one thing is certain, it was an expression of your motherly love – so priceless that money cannot buy and so timeless that time cannot erase.

Dear Mum, yes you are gone in the body but you remain alive in our mind.

You were a good mother. Yes you truly were.

Today, If I wanted to understand the meaning of a mother, I don’t struggle to do that. I simply think of you. When I remember who you were and what you did, I understand who a mother is.

I cannot think of a single thing a mother should do for their children that you didn’t do for me. Not one. From the motherly love and sacrifices to the provisions of food and clothing you made.

How can I forget those ewa agonyin, the obe gbanumi, the obe egusi combo with amala and many other food delicacies? What about those days you would give me and my brothers Tokunbo and Bola money after school to go and buy bread from the bakery in the neighbourhood? We would run as fast as we could to ensure we brought back very hot freshly baked bread straight out of those gigantic clay ovens so we could spread butter on it and see it melt pleasurably on the bread.

Those memories cannot be forgotten.

What about the birthdays you organised,

the discipline, moral codes and tenets of faith you built in me and my siblings?

What about the support with school home work, your attendances at parents-teachers meetings and the rewards you often gave me for academic excellence including treats of extra pieces of meats? Mum, those little acts had phenomenal impact in building me up to who I am now. I am a happy man today because I had a happy childhood.

You continued to be a mother to me throughout your lifetime because motherhood is eternal. It never ends.

As I entered the university, graduated, went for my mandatory national youth service, searched for jobs and started working, you were part of every journey.

And when the time came for me to fly like a bird out of the nest in January 2004, this time 6,000 miles away from Nigeria to the UK in search of the proverbial greener pasture, just like you and dad had done 40 years earlier, you were there. I spent that last night before my departure, with you and dad talking with me and admonishing me, and for the first time in my life I saw dad shed tears as he bade me farewell.

Even though it’s been 8 years since you have been gone, I’m happy to let you know all 5 of us your children you left behind are fine: my sisters Ronke, Doyin and my brothers Tokunbo and Bola. And so are your 11 grandchildren. Although in your usual humorous nature, you had offered me some bed tips on how my wife Sade and I can conceive either a male or female child if we wanted a specific gender, I didn’t carry out your advice because we decided to stop at 2 kids – Adeola and Tola whom you last met a month before your departure.

As we celebrate your posthumous 80th birthday today, we are comforted by the legacy of your good works. We draw comfort from the faith you introduced to us – that not our good works but our belief in the vicarious death and resurrection of Christ is the basis of man’s eternal salvation. And that by this, even though you are gone, you are in a better place where one day we will meet with you never to part again.

Happy Birthday Mum!

Your son Ayo celebrates your eternal motherhood